For a 40th wedding anniversary, the song that hits hardest is the one that tells their own story: how they met, the first house, the kids, the habit the whole family teases them about. If you want a well-known song, Alan Jackson's “Remember When” or Kenny Rogers' “Through the Years” say lasting love beautifully. If you want their names in the chorus, a custom song is written in minutes: two full tracks set to your lyrics, and you keep both.
Forty years is the ruby anniversary. The kids are in their thirties, sometimes their forties, and they are the ones planning it: the venue, the caterer, the group chat where everyone splits up the photos to scan. Someone has asked, “What if we gave them a song?” The question is which one, and what goes in it.
Here are the real options, from a playlist to lyrics you write yourself, with what each one takes. Then a sample verse and chorus for a 40th anniversary, ready to adapt to your parents.
What changes at 40 years
At 25, the silver anniversary celebrates a couple still mid-race: teenagers at home, a mortgage to pay. At 50, the golden anniversary mostly looks back. Forty sits in between. The couple is often in their sixties, retirement has arrived or is close, the first grandkids are running around the table, and there are still plenty of plans. So the song can talk about the road travelled without sounding like a eulogy.
It is also the anniversary the children give most often. Their point of view is the best material you have: what they saw of their parents as kids, and only understood later. Sometimes one spouse plans the surprise for the other, and then the song becomes a declaration, forty years after the first one.
At forty years, you do not sing about how long it lasted. You sing about what held, and why.
40th anniversary songs: the options
A playlist of songs about lasting love
The easiest route, and it works well through dinner or under a slideshow. A few songs about growing older together, without the gloom:
- “Remember When”, Alan Jackson: the whole marriage in four minutes. The classic choice.
- “Through the Years”, Kenny Rogers: made for a slideshow of old photos.
- “Still the One”, Shania Twain: for a lighter, smiling moment.
- “Forever and Ever, Amen”, Randy Travis: the promise, with a grin.
- “Can't Help Falling in Love”, Elvis Presley: for the couple's dance.
Add the song from their wedding, the one they danced to in 1986: it is usually the one that gets both of them out of their chairs. The limit: these songs are about love in general, not about them.
A rewritten song on a famous tune
Take a famous melody and rewrite the words with their stories: a family-party tradition, and a charming one. Plan one or two evenings of writing. The limits are well known: the syllables have to fit, someone has to dare sing in front of forty people, and the result only survives as a phone video. Pick a tune everyone knows and hand out printed lyrics.
A speech from the kids, or letters
A three-minute speech, written together, with three specific memories: nothing costs less, and few things land as well. A variation: each child and grandchild writes a letter, bound into a small book. The pitfall: improvising over dessert. You think you will hold it together; you rarely do.
A song written about them
A real song, with both their names, their story and a chorus the family can sing back. A musician can write one in a few weeks. A custom song is written in minutes: you tell the story, pick the style, and get two full tracks. Our custom wedding anniversary song page walks through the steps.
What to put in the lyrics for a 40th anniversary
When you order, you can give both names (“Linda and Ray”): they are sung exactly as written. You tell their story freely, or let a few questions guide you. You read the lyrics, fix them, and only pay after that. For forty years, be ruthless: three or four images, not a biography.
- How they met: the county fair, the college library, the flat tire outside her parents' house.
- What they built: the house they fixed up, the business they ran together, the kids and their personalities.
- Their ritual: Sunday pancakes, Friday card night, the same argument on every road trip.
- What is starting: retirement, the RV, the grandkids they pick up from school.
Sample lyrics for a 40th anniversary song
An example written for Linda and Ray, married in 1986, given by their children. Swap the details for yours: precision is what makes the song.
Verse: Summer of '86, a borrowed Chevy truck, / Ray swore he knew the way, Linda swore they'd both get stuck, / a one-room place in Dayton and a radio that hissed, / forty years of Sunday pancakes started with that kiss.
Chorus: Forty years, Linda and Ray, / still dancing in the kitchen at the end of the day, / you taught us without saying it that love's a choice you make, / forty years, and tonight we sing it for your sake.
How to play it on the day
The right moment: after the main course, before the cake, when everyone is seated. One line of introduction is enough (“we tried to fit forty years into three minutes”), then press play. If the kids give a speech, the song comes right after: it takes over when the voice starts to shake.
For an anniversary dinner, music for a slideshow does a lot. With The Platinum, up to 10 photos scroll past as polaroids over the song, the wedding photo first and today's last, then the MP4 video arrives by email. See it on the slideshow demo, sound on.
Mistakes that spoil a 40th anniversary song
- Making the number the chorus: “forty years” sung eight times is all the room will remember.
- Telling the rough patches: what makes the kids laugh can hurt one of them in front of the family.
- Leaving one of them out: a song mostly about Mom, and Dad stares at his plate.
- Building it around rubies: nobody tears up over a red stone.
- Waiting until the night before: collecting stories from siblings takes a week.
Prices and lead times, straight
To place the song among other 40th anniversary gifts, here are the orders of magnitude. For ideas year by year, our guide to wedding anniversary gifts goes through each milestone.
| Gift | Indicative price | Lead time |
|---|---|---|
| Song written by a musician | €150 to €600 | Two to six weeks |
| Film from old photos and digitised reels | €150 to €400 | Two to three weeks |
| Book of letters or photo album | €40 to €90 | Three weeks of collecting |
| Rewritten song on a famous tune | Free | One or two evenings |
| Tubissime custom song | €5, €8 or €13 | A few minutes |
The three packages: The Single at €5 (about 2 min 30, MP3), The Gold Record at €8 (about 3 min 30, full-screen karaoke, illustrated cover) and The Platinum at €13 (about 5 minutes, slideshow of your photos, MP4 video). Each delivers two full tracks. Market prices are broken down in how much a custom song costs. Fifteen years earlier came the 25th anniversary song; ten years on comes the golden anniversary song.
Frequently asked questions
What songs are good for a 40th anniversary?
Classics about lasting love: “Remember When” by Alan Jackson, “Through the Years” by Kenny Rogers, “Still the One” by Shania Twain, plus the song from their wedding. For a song about them, with their names and memories, a custom song is written in minutes and played at the dinner.
What is the 40th wedding anniversary called?
In the US and the UK, the 40th is the ruby anniversary. In France it is the emerald anniversary, and naming varies elsewhere, which is why many families simply talk about the 40th.
How do I write a song for my parents' 40th anniversary?
Pick three or four specific memories, one per era, plus a ritual the whole family recognises. Write from the children's point of view: what you saw of them. Keep a simple chorus the room can sing back, with both their names.
What music works for a 40th anniversary slideshow?
A song that moves at a steady pace and lasts long enough for your photos: around three to five minutes. A song that tells their story makes the same pictures mean more. With The Platinum, the slideshow is built on the song for you and delivered as an MP4.
Key takeaways
For a 40th anniversary, a playlist of love classics dresses up the dinner, but only a song that tells their story is about them. Pick three or four memories, put both names in the chorus, and play it before the cake, right after the speech. Once the stories are collected, write their song.